Regan’s story and raise awareness,’ she continues. discussing and asking questions about someone’s ‘If I can impact just one person, it’s worth it.’ suicidal thoughts does not increase the likelihood Angela speaks with an admirable poise about they will attempt suicide. confronting topics like suicidal thoughts and Of the many messages Beyond Blue and its patterns. She is, unfortunately, well-versed with the speakers promote, one rings true for a whole internal dialogue of a person at risk. network of young people in Queensland: ‘people ‘Quite often their thinking is “I’d be doing may not think they are important, but losing one everyone a favour, I’m a burden”. But nobody is a affects so many’. burden,’ she says. ‘So many of Regan’s friends are still in contact As she helps others understand what plagues the with me because it’s not something that ever gets mind of someone at risk, Angela hopes her words better,’ Angela says. ‘I still get text messages from ‘JUST GETTING inspire people to reach out to each other – whether his mates in the middle of the night saying “I just IT OUT CAN they are concerned about themselves or others. miss him”.’ HELP SO MUCH. This ripple effect is particularly damaging among WHAT MIGHT ‘I’m truly motivated to tell Regan’s story men, Angela notes. BE A BAD DAY and raise awareness ... if I can impact ‘For years, the attitude among tradies, sportsmen TODAY COULD just one person, it’s worth it.’ and other men in a male-dominated environment TURN AROUND was “harden up” and that’s just the way it was. TOMORROW’ I think it is harder for men to go and seek help And although Angela encourages everyone to because of that, it created stigma around asking for talk these struggles through, advising people to help. ‘find somebody that you trust and have a chat with ‘There’s a long way to go, this idea has been them because often once you get it out, you do feel forged in men for many, many generations so to better’, she emphasises, above everything else, the expect a change in one is a little unrealistic. But I importance of simply listening. think things are, slowly but surely, getting better ‘It’s so important for people to be aware of and we’re helping men realise that it is okay to talk the signs being thrown off by their mates and to about things. actually sit and listen. Particularly as a parent, it’s ‘I think we all go through our mental struggles, hard to see your kids struggle through something no matter how strong we seem,’ she goes on, challenging and not try to solve it for them, but you acknowledging the occasional bouts of anxiety she just need to listen.’ has suffered since Regan’s death. ‘But just getting This sentiment is endorsed by recent research it out can help so much. What might be a bad day from Beyond Blue which found family and friends today could turn around tomorrow.’ can provide great assistance to someone in severe For support and further information go to distress or at risk of suicide, regardless of whether www.beyondblue.org.au or call 1300 224 636. or not they have professional training. Allowing someone to feel heard can be a powerful aid, and when professional support is needed, Beyond Blue can provide it for those suffering as well as those supporting them. The research project also found that despite a commonly-held belief among Australians, NOVEMBER 2018 HOUSING 99 LIFESTYLES • HIA CHARITABLE FOUNDATION